How to Deal With Extended Periods of Being Apart

It's a situation that comes up quite often. One orother people. Resist this urge. Call your friends and
both partners have to go away for a while- maybeeven reconnect with friends you haven't talked to in
for an extended business trip or to visit ailing family.a while and schedule some time with them. When
The separation can last anywhere from a fewyou're with them, don't talk about your lover, just
weeks to a few months. Sometimes the separationfocus on the present and enjoy their company to
is a year or longer in the case of the spouses ofthe fullest.
individuals in the armed forces. It's easy to get4. Tie up loose ends- often when you are in a
caught up in feelings of loneliness and sadness. Thiscommitted relationship, you find that you have less
can affect other areas of your life and you maytime to do some of the things you could do when
start to feel depressed, staying home and not doingyou are single. Between work and other
the things you'd normally like to do. Here are someresponsibilities, a relationship can take up a lot of your
tips to help you avoid falling into a rut when youfree time. That's not a bad thing, but what it means
have to deal with an extended absence:is that you might have some loose ends lying around
1. Keep your mind busy- take this time to find somethat you haven't gotten a chance to take care of,
new activities or hobbies that will engage you andsuch as fixing the radio in your car or doing some
take your mind off of your lover. Go do somespring cleaning. Now's the time to take care of some
outdoor activities like hiking or join a social group suchof the things you've been procrastinating about.
as to meet new people5. Work on yourself- take into account how long
2. Focus on the present- avoid spending too muchyour lover will be away and make yourself a task of
time pining away. Even though you love and missaccomplishing a realistic goal by the time they come
your partner, it's not energy well spent thinking aboutback. For example, if they are gone for a month,
how you miss them. Instead, focus on being mindfulmake a goal to hit the gym every day and lose 5lbs
and present in all of your daily activities. Even if youof fat and gain 5lbs of muscle by the time they
are doing mundane daily tasks such as washing thecome back, or if they are gone for 3 months, make
dishes, put all of your attention on the task at hand.yourself a goal to write a short novel in that time.
This is one of the principles of meditation, take aWhatever works for you. Just take into consideration
meditation class in your local area to learn how towhat your goals are and what you can realistically
bring back your attention and focus on the present.accomplish in that particular span of time.
3. Schedule time with friends- if you are missing yourStart putting this list into practice and you'll find that
partner, sometimes the natural inclination is toyour time apart will go by much faster!
withdraw and want to be alone, rather than be with